It's alright for some
by Mistofstars
Summary: Castiel has made his decision - he wants to become human, with Dean's help. DESTIEL (mushy smut tbh) - M just to be safe.


Author: Mistofstars

Pairing: Dean Winchester / Castiel (Destiel)

Warnings: sappy, smut, sappy smut haha

Author's note: 2 assumptions regarding this story. 1: angels become mortal once they've had sex. 2: takes place in Dean's own room (batcave) in season 8. Brief appearance of Sam. Oh, one more thing – you know what I do when I have thousands of still unfinished fanfictions lyring around here? I just write another oneshot haha sobs.

Disclaimer: Neither Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester or Castiel are mine. They belong to their creators of Supernatural. I make no money with this, everything is made up, no copyright infringement intended.

**It's alright for some**

"_Yes, there are two paths you can go by_

_but in the long run_

_there's still time to change the road you're on"_

_(Stairway to heaven, Led Zeppelin)_

In all his existence Castiel had learnt quite a lot about mankind. Their cravings, their weaknesses, how easily they could be seduced to walk on the wrong path straight to Hell. During the uncountable thousands of years he had seen heroes fall and strong men cry, he had seen the whole misery mankind brought down on itself. And yet, he thought with a smile, he had also witnessed the beauty, creativity and art of men – there was loyalty, togetherness, love and affection. No other being was able to build such skyscrapers or to imitate a bird's fly with an air-plane. All this goodness was enough to balance or to even outweigh everything bad on this Earth. Castiel was fascinated about humans and their uniqueness in God's universe.

And so he craved for human feelings, human thoughts – he envied them in so many ways. They had a free will to do whatever they liked, as foolish as it might be, while he had never done anything else but to follow Heaven's orders. Until Dean Winchester had come across his path to change everything he had believed in; he had made him feel that there were things he actually wanted and not wanted. Although his mind and heart had been a complex tumult ever since, Castiel was thrilled and overjoyed to have met Dean.

Now they were standing face to face and Castiel smiled softly at Dean, thinking how beautifully the man combined mankind's flaws and virtues within his soul. Oh, he could be angry and jealous and cold-hearted, but he was also strong and loyal and truly loving and caring about those close to him. Dean was always ready to sacrifice himself selflessly for Sam or for the whole world's population. To Castiel there was absolutely no doubt that Dean Winchester was a hero, even more so, a martyr. He knew it was as good as impossible to ever find another man as him again. He wanted to stay in his nearness forever. He had made his decision.

This time Castiel wanted to be the martyr, a martyr for love. He thirsted for being human, and he thirsted for being with Dean. The moment that he had decided it for himself, he knew there was no turning back ever again. Deep in his heart he had promised himself to never feel regret about this, come what may. Dean's deep green eyes beheld Castiel softly in the warm yellow light of his own room, then he took a step forward and slowly helped Cas out of his beige trench coat. He hung it up on the wardrobe at the door, and soon Castiel's suit jacket was hanging next to it and Dean's green jacket.

They moved together effortlessly and without a single word uttered. Dean's fingers slowly undid Castiel's blue tie gently and slowly, while their eyes rested on each other. Castiel marvelled at the slow sensual feeling Dean created when he pulled the tie away from his collar, then he let it fall down to the ground carelessly. There was a little smile playing around the corners of Cas' mouth, but Dean couldn't respond to it. Except maybe for the calm tenderness resting in his gaze, so unbelievably soft and sympathetic that it shook Cas to his deepest core. Before he knew it his own fingers fled to the buttons of his white long-sleeved shirt, and he opened one by one blindly, his eyes never leaving Dean's. He saw the effect it had on Dean, as the man's breathing hitched and his fingers seemed to twitch impatiently. Castiel wanted to make sure Dean understood he wasn't going to back down now, not after all he had seen and been through, not, when there was this hurricane in his heart screaming for more.

He took off his shirt leisurely, revealing the lean naked upper body of his long gone vessel's person. Dean's eyes darted over the slim waist and his bare chest restlessly, and obviously they were feasting on the given sight. When the man placed his flat palms on Cas' naked skin, as if to make sure he was still there and that this here was really happening, the simple touch seemed reassuring and electrifying to the angel. He moved closer to Dean's warmth, wanting to feel more of the man he craved for, and finally there broke something in Dean, and he smiled, deeply moved and surprised.

Then he enveloped Castiel in his arms, his chest meeting Dean's clothed one. He answered to Dean's embrace and his fingers dug into the back of Dean's shirt. It was a wonderful feeling, Dean's every breath moving against his, the friction of his uprising chest meeting his, his hands holding him safely and strongly. It was the moment Castiel realized he wasn't afraid, not at all. He trusted Dean and he had no worries about laying his life and fate into his hands. Whatever was awaiting him after this, it was already worth it – realizing Dean truly loved him, making his every wish real, no matter what, it overwhelmed Castiel with joy.

Soon they were kissing slowly and sensually – there was no rush, though there were enough lust and need driving them mad. Castiel forgot every reasonable thought when Dean stripped off his own clothes in front of him, then freeing Cas of his remaining clothes. Castiel was gently pushed to the bed. As they lay there together, both nervous, breathless and naked, Dean couldn't help but stroke through Castiel's dark strands again and again, his green eyes bearing an expression of pain, melancholy and love. It was an intimate gesture, far more intimate it seemed than the fact they were going to have sex.

"I can't believe you're making this sacrifice", Dean quietly said, and in his voice Castiel detected the raw distress the man was feeling. He blindly grasped Dean's hand and their fingers intertwined. Castiel was fascinated about the heat and the undeniable awareness of every particle of Dean's fingertips meeting his skin. He felt his body warmth wavering to him like a comforting blanket, he could smell his clean soapy scent filling him – Castiel felt completely safe and at ease, enraptured by the being he loved. He sealed Dean's lips with a heartfelt kiss, then he calmly said under his breath "It's my choice, and I've waited long enough."

There was a cheeky smile on Dean's mouth, which made Cas smirk.

"True, long enough", he replied, and that was it. The last affirmation both of them had needed to bring this desperate plan into completion. Then a long journey started in which Dean travelled leisurely over Castiel's body, kissing and stroking every part of his flesh and skin in utter adoration, his mouth and fingers making Castiel fall into a frenzy of stuttered confessions and whimpered voiced wishes. His pelvis trembled as he moved it against Dean's vicious tongue, which was leaving wet trails on his abdomen. Castiel's fingers dug into Dean's blonde soft hair as the human took the head of his dick into his hot narrow mouth, licking and sucking on it teasingly. Castiel couldn't stop sighing and moaning and writhing on the sheets in desperate ecstasy when Dean started to have his way with the angel, giving him head thoroughly. Through a fog of electric lightning of waves of lust Castiel saw Dean's head bobbing up and down to repeatedly take his whole length inside his moist tight mouth, his teeth scraping over his sensitive skin maddeningly. Castiel thought he could feel the back of Dean's throat against which he thrust time and again.

He wavered between pleasure and pain when Dean shoved his forefinger inside him to the hilt, circling it within his heat provokingly while he continued sucking him; soon he heard himself utter sounds he had never heard himself utter before and he cursed a blasphemy when Dean pushed another finger slowly inside him, widening and preparing his hole for him. The thought brought a blush to Castiel's cheeks as he thought about Dean taking him. His two fingers inside him already hurt, but in such a good way, as they stretched him, but he was pretty certain he couldn't take Dean's erection completely inside him, it seemed anatomically impossible.

He was convinced of the contrary though when Dean finally let go of his dick to bend over him, shoving his legs apart to place himself between his spread thighs. Castiel mused for a moment what he looked like to Dean as he felt the head of Dean's cock penetrating him, and as he arched his back with an agonized groan to meet him. He perceived Dean entering him slowly and completely, hissing as he was controlling himself not to thrust into Cas' tight heat mindlessly. Castiel studied the burning ache and the sensation of Dean inside him, filling him most perfectly. He couldn't help but breathe against the pain as he lost himself in the way Dean looked at him, with so much reverence and anguish that it shattered his heart. Soon the pain was gone and Dean started to venture his first moves inside him, and before Castiel knew it, he was digging his fingernails into Dean's rotating hips, pronouncing voiceless demands that sounded like "more" and "deeper" and "faster". It felt exceptional, like nothing else he had experienced thus far, and sometimes Dean met this sensitive spot within him which released a wave of heat and a tickling giddy feel which made Cas squeak and tremble with lust.

His hands started to do what they had wanted to do for such a long while; They roamed over Dean's chest and back and butt, seizing flesh and muscles, fondling soft skin, as Castiel studied the feel of Dean's body under his fingertips, his mouth slightly open in surprise. There was a breathless smile lingering on Dean's lips as his eyes met Cas' and as he detected the first beads of sweat forming on the angel's throat and forehead. Yet soon the smile disappeared when there were black wings spreading underneath Castiel's back, filling out the empty space of the room, and the wingtips collided with the sidewalls of Dean's room. One of Castiel's warm palms cupped Dean's face and there was a broken smile on his lips, as his low voice said "I knew this would happen, continue". And then Dean moved more forcefully within him, pressing against Cas' weak spot mercilessly and he saw the angel moaning underneath him in complete rapture. He also saw how rapidly the black feathers fell from his wings, how the sinews and bones underneath started to burn and crumble like chalk; and Castiel's fingernails dug painfully into Dean's back as he moaned in lust and cried in endless agony as his wings burnt and as the whole room was soaked with black feathers and smoke. There were tears running down Castiel's cheeks and his eyes were narrowed in pain, and Dean kissed him fervently to diminish his outcries of his orgasm and to incorporate his whimpers of his cruel dolorous downfall.

Castiel came undone with Dean's last slow-downed strokes inside him, spreading his cum between their bellies rubbing against each other. Dean bit into Cas' throat as he came, Castiel's muscles tightening around him vehemently, and both of them didn't care Dean was leaving dark love bruises on Castiel's skin. As soon as Dean had gathered his breath again, he uplifted his head to consider Castiel's face, which was a calm traumatized mask now. His blue eyes stared at the ceiling unfocussed and to Dean it almost seemed as if he was dead. His wings were gone, his body seemed completely human.

"Are you feeling alright?", he asked, unable to hide the worry seeping through him. Castiel's eyes wandered slowly to his and when they met he smiled faintly, exhausted. He nodded and his hands framed Dean's face lovingly.

"It hurts to become human", he replied, and after this, he didn't speak for a few hours.

…

Later that evening Sam went to check on Dean, whether he wanted to sup with him or go out for dinner. He knocked against the door half-heartedly, and then he opened it – slowly, as he realized the lights in Dean's room were out. To his surprise he saw Dean was already asleep, and what surprised him only slightly more was the fact he was holding a sleeping Castiel in his arm – and both of them seemed to be naked beneath the blankets. The room was filled with millions of black feathers, and among them were Dean's and Cas' scattered clothes. There was a moved and happy smile on Sam's lips as he observed their peaceful sleeping faces. He put one and one together pretty quickly, realizing additionally that Cas was sleeping, which he never did. Quietly Sam shut the door and walked back into the kitchen to make something to eat for the two.

A few hours later Sam lazed around in the living room, lying on the couch with a book and a bottle of beer, as he heard movement in Dean's room. The shower seemed to be in use and he almost thought the lovebirds would drop in soon, but after a while he heard the shower was turned off, and then there were quiet moans and even some laughter and Sam rolled his eyes in amusement.

Finally Dean's door was opened and Sam heard steps on the floor. Dean walked into the room, wearing nothing but his black shorts and a grey shirt, his hair looked quite messed up; he was being followed by Castiel, and Sam was taken aback at how changed he looked – he was clearly wearing a jeans of Dean and a black shirt, and thereover Dean's favourite reddish plaid shirt. His hair was still wet. Sam wasn't going to say he had appeared ugly in his trench coat and his suit, but this new look made him seem more dauntless and and erratic, so he could totally understand why Dean had taken his time to pay a visit to Sam. Dean stopped as he saw Sam lying on the sofa nonchalantly, and he smirked kind of embarrassed at his younger brother, scratching his neck nervously. He quickly met Sam's eyes, seeing the knowing grin in his brother's face, then he averted his gaze.

"Uhm, Sam, I, we, uh, need to tell you something", he blurted out as his fingers automatically intertwined with Castiel's, who was standing right beside Dean. Sam didn't know whether he was supposed to laugh or be embarrassed, but he couldn't wipe the grin from his face. Castiel's and Dean's eyes rested on his when he just said "Guys, it's okay, I already figured it out." Dean looked at him as if he wasn't understanding what he was referring to, so Sam rolled his eyes.

"The feathers all over your room. The hickey on Cas' neck, not to mention the awful sounds I've heard. Oh, and you're holding hands. I got it, Dean. Castiel is human now and you two are a thing. Now, I made you some dinner because I thought you might be hungry after your little exercises. It's in the kitchen waiting for you."

Sam wanted to laugh when he saw the shock and overwhelmed astonishment in Dean's features, but Castiel just warmly smiled at Sam and said "Thank you, Sam", dragging Dean by the hand to the kitchen, where they found two cheeseburgers prepared for them. Sam walked into the kitchen, seeing them eating with relish like starved neglected pets and he couldn't help but smile.

"Are you alright?", he asked and Dean looked up, shrugging off every serious notion Sam could have meant.

"What do you mean, of course", he said, returning his focus on his half eaten burger. To the Winchester's surprise Cas kicked Dean's shinbone cheekily and playfully underneath the table, making Dean curse. Castiel gave Sam a friendly look, a quick sideglance to Dean.

"Yes. We're alright. And if not", his blue eyes darted over Dean's green ones, to finally rest on them,

"we will be."

Dean gently smiled at him.

THE END

well, what do you think? Actually this was meant to be 1000 words but unfortunately I seem to be unable to keep things short... sorry if this was a little weird haha ^_^ by the way did they change the font of again!?


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